Thursday, August 26, 2010

Well...

I'm not sure where to go with this :)
I'm warning you, it might not be inspiring.
I mean, I'm doing great.  My class is fun, although challenging.
My days are LONG.
My angles are only a tiny bit swollen so far.

People always ask me how I"m doing.
"Tired" is the answer.
Broken record? I think so.
It seems like it gets worse and worse.
I stayed at school until 5:40 yesterday (wednesday) talking to two parents from last year who I miss, and I would hang out with on a regular basis if time allowed. They are both wonderful, and I had two good talks. But I wore heels yesterday....boots in fact. I wish I would have taken a picture, it was a cute outfit.
On my way home, I kept thinking, "I have never been so tired in my whole life".  When I got home, I laid down, hoping for relief.  People forgot to tell me that laying down doesn't really work when you're pregnant.  It isn't that comfortable.  I need a really comfortable air harness....or something...

Today was open house after school.
I left about 6:45pm.
My best bud Rebecca came back from maternity leave for the day to meet her students. She is coming back in a little more than a week.  We wore the same dress. On accident. It was amazing.  I walked into her room and we both groaned.  Blonde hair, one of us formerly pregnant....one of us currently.....she had cute flowers in her hair, I ALMOST wore mine!  It gave us a good laugh at least. No pictures of that. I was too lazy and sleepy and ready to come home to rest.
I was smarter today and wore flats all day and changed into wedges right at the end of the day.
My back hurts today, from yesterday.
Today, one adult woman told me, "Yeah, you are huge!" and another told me, "You make being pregnant really cute". One comment made me feel like a huge beluga whale and the other made me smile the rest of the day. Oh, the power of our words! (The 'huge' comment was only meant to point out the obvious, that compared to before, I have inflated with fluid VERY quickly and have turned into a huge basketball carrier)
Students from last year often ask me about the baby.  They ask, "Are you going to have a baby?" or "Are you pregnant, Mrs.Whitis"....I respond with the lamest of all answers...."I don't know"....
I'm not lying. What I mean is, "I don't know what to say to you"....so instead I just say, "I don't know"....to save myself the drama and emotion. :)  Poor kids. They are so confused by their teacher's giant tumor-ous stomach. :)  I did send a note home to my current parents to inform them about the condition and tell them I wanted to focus on their children while I was at school and not talk about the baby.  IT WORKED. Not one parent mentioned the VERY OBVIOUS elephant in the room today.  Very stress-free.  It was just a normally-tiring Open House. Trying to give a nice little welcome, while I yell to allow parents to hear me over the very crazy younger siblings.
I wish I had some cute pictures to share. Something totally moving and inspiring.
Nope. None of it.
But if you want, I'll show you the huge-ness.
Tomorrow, I am going to the doctor again, to check Briar's positioning.  As I feel so tired, and feel his feet lodge under my ribs when I sit down to talk to my students (or read to them), I feel so thankful.  Thankful that I have this time.  Thankful that he's so healthy in utero.  Sometimes I wonder HOW he can be okay in there and not out here.  But, he is.
I am so ADD.
All over the place.
Tomorrow I am also going to get my hair done (cheering!).  I was going to go back to work for an hour or so, but then I figured out I could get in to my very high demand hair dresser (who is also pregnant and came to my love shower), so I figured I better take it.  I want nice hair for my maternity pics! We are taking them this weekend! Probably tomorrow night!
What a crazy day tomorrow will be.
I'll try to break the camera out. :)


 

5 comments:

  1. You always look adorable! Can't wait to see your cut and your pics!!

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  2. I think it is cute that you are changing shoes at the end of the day!

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  3. I remember avoiding the "are you pregnant?" question. It came kinda natural since I was pregnant during the winter, nice big baggy sweaters covered my belly. In looking back I regret that I didn't show my Noah proudly...talk about him more. Now I have nothing to show for the baby I lost.

    I know it's a really hard time for you now. Sometimes you just need to do what gets you through the day. Praying for you.

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  4. We just went to Leadership Retreat and all I can tell you is "That I know the one that whom I trust. " Pete taught from the book of 2 Tim. and it is Pauls letter to Timothy, his last letter. I am amazed at Paul's transformation 32 words from Jesus changed Pauls plans forever. He came from wanting to kill Christians to tranfrorming people into Jesus followers. Katie Eckerd is a friend of mine, we go to church together. We attend the same chruch. It sounds alot like your church. Remenber that your story is your ministry!
    I love you and Brandon so much, Im praying for you!!!

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  5. You are beautiful....loving so well in the midst of your pain. Your story will never be forgotten and Briar's legacy will live on for generations.

    Put your feet up and rest tonight.
    xo

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