Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I was so nervous

to go back to school!
buoy welcome
Why? I have no idea!
I love my class. My kids.
I guess I was nervous that I would get lots of questions from the kids from last year.
Or that I would randomly burst into tears.
Or that I would feel like an imposter in my classroom.
But guess what?
I felt like normal Mrs.Whitis! The minute those kids walked in...
Just like nothing ever happened (at least at work?)
It was awesome.
They came running in with looks of shock and surprise...(they had no clue I was coming back...I even surprised myself by deciding to come back this week after my substitute had a second family emergency...and I just felt ready to be there!). 

They were so truly happy it made me feel really loved.
One girl told me, "I missed you every day, I thought you would never come back!"
Most kids didn't even ask details about where I was. Do you believe that? They just accepted me!  No questions. Man, sometimes adults need to take a lesson from sweet children.

The only blip on the radar that could have gone south fast was when I asked  question about continents and hands went up all around my room.  I called on my star student, a sweet little girl who I love.  She caught me a bit off guard by not asking anything remotely related to continents. She said, "So, what did you name your baby??". I laughed but decided it best to just ignore her :)  I just moved on and said, "We're not talking about that now." (sweetly)...then, "Adam? What do you know about Africa?..."  :) Crisis avoided. And no one brought it up again! Just crazy.

The parents were even sweeter. When I went outside I had all these shocked gasps and hugs. They were happy to see me, which relieved another fear I didn't know I had.  Would they judge me for being gone even though I didn't have a "typical" maternity leave? I didn't care for a baby. So I traveled so I wouldn't have to pretend to feel normal and do normal routine things...when life is anything but normal.  Which sort of worked.

I even had two new students, and I got to meet their parents.  So, all in all, today was a success. As I left the building today, I passed two of my students from the last two years. I smiled at them and said hi and I heard one whisper to the other, "Did she have her baby?"...for some reason that was a little sad.  Maybe because normally I would have turned around and said, (thankful for the excuse to talk about him) "Yes, his name is Briar!! Do you want to see a picture? He was born at 3:38am...(insert TMI here...). 

I am so glad I was a little nervous this morning.
Being scared is good. It forces me to trust that God is in control, not me.
I have no reason to be nervous!
Honestly, I'm shocked it took me so long to get back into things
But regardless, I'm so happy I am back.
I am equally happy that I will work three weeks and then have next week off to gear up for the next three weeks!

Looking forward to tomorrow. It is called "Incredibly Terrific Kid day"!! Doesn't that sound fun? It is!! Looking forward to see more smiles on those sweet faces, while I try to keep smiling while I help them make a 3D version of a landscape/terrain map using salt dough and paint...with 21 second graders. :)
I think that alone warrants some prayer...

"You are my hiding place; 
       you will protect me from trouble
       and surround me with songs of deliverance."    
Psalm 32:7

gray ric rac copy


  1. Yay! I am so glad you had a good first day back! *Hugs*

  2. What a great first day back - glad to hear it! Hang in there - you will have good days and bad. God be with you sweet momma!